• Nick Schnell

The Chronicles of Nick Schnell; VOL.1 URINE SHOWERS




Baseball players are some of the most superstitious athletes on the planet. There are all kinds of tips and tricks you learn when you get into the baseball world. The longer you are around the more you intune you become with those tips and tricks. Some make a little more sense than others. Exhibit A, pitchers mix sunscreen and rosin for a little extra stick on their fingers when they pitch. The rules have changed and that was taken away from them this year, but we won't get into that now. I will ask you this though. Have you ever wondered what other little tricks baseball players do to gain a little edge?


Many baseball fans have heard the stories of Moises Alou, Jorge Posada, and Kerry Wood peeing on their hands to toughen them up. Straight warriors if you ask me. I mean these guys were peeing on their hands for God sake. Now I didn’t have to get into pro ball to hear about this trick. I heard about this little trick when I was about 12 years old. What does any 12 year old kid playing baseball want to do...? Be a big leaguer and be like big leaguers. So what does young 12 year old Nick Schnell do? I bet you got a pretty good idea.


I am 12 years old and trying to roughen up my hand, so I can be like the big leaguers. Every morning before school, I hop in the shower and what do you know? I leak a little on my hands. Rub my hands back and forth, like it was -13 degrees outside and I was trying to warm my hands up. Do this for maybe a week or two and what do you know little 12 year old Nick Schnell goes off for those 2 weeks. I mean I was unconscious at the plate. I couldn’t get out if you made me hit righty. So it is time to take word to the streets. I went to school to tell the boys I got the magic serum. What do you think a group of 12 year olds do when you tell them you pee on your hands? They don’t give you a high five and congratulate you, that is a fact. So my time peeing on my hands to “toughen them up” didn’t last very long. So I did a little research as I was reflecting on my pee hands stint. Let me tell y'all, I am glad I stopped.


After a bit of research, I found not only does peeing on your hands not “toughen them up” they soften them up. This is used as a skin care routine. Apparently there's something in your pee that promotes good skin. You tell me it promotes good skin, I would call you crazy. Tell me it gets me hits and where is the nearest shower? I wonder if anyone ever thought to tell ole Moises, Jorge, and Kerry they didn’t have to do that. If they wanted to toughen up their hands they could have just hit the weight room, and ripped a couple deadlifts with 500 lbs on the bar. Nonetheless it is an electric story and these guys are forever legends. I can also always look back and remember the memory of me going to school and telling the boys I was pissing on my dang hands. Shout out to Moises, Jorge, and Kerry for the memories, I owe y’all one.



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